Today, as I poured my heart out to God during my morning devotion, I was faced with the fact that I am not enough, and never will be... yet He gently reminds me 'I.am.here.'
And on these days when I don't know where to begin, that is all I really need to know.
Our lives around here look messy right now. Our days are full of learning a culture that is so far from what we have always know. Learning a language that we do not understand, learning God in a way we never have before.
Learning how to cook in a place that is unfamiliar. Learning how to work as a husband and wife team in a way we never have before. Learning together as a family about our new home.
There are days whenI feels like I do not have the strength to meet the need of another. Days where my flesh just wants to meet the needs of it's own. Days where I call out to God and question if He called the right girl and days where I wish He hadn't.
Days where I wonder if simply cuddling a child who has never had a mother to console them after they fell is enough? Days where I try to make it about me instead of about Him. Days where I wonder how the world around me can go on in the mist of so much suffering and so much pain.
Days where I wonder how the God of compassion can allow so much loss and devastation in this world. Days where I find it difficult to understand. Days where I question if we will ever be able to make much of a difference and days where I wonder why I thought I possibly could.
Days where I question myself and days where I question Him. Days where it isn't pretty and days where it's all I can do to muster the words, 'where are you Lord?'But then He reminds me...
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ~2 Corinthians 12:9And so we begin each new day learning as we go... becoming what He needs us to become, failing misserably along the way, yet having hope that even in those circumstances He can work. Struggling to understand yet clinging to His word and who He is. Reminding myself it's okay that I am not enough- because He is. Knowing that is the truth no matter where we live or where this life brings us.
He is enough.
Even on those days we loose sight of that fact, He is enough.
And do for today, I am simply here.
Over the course of the next few weeks leading up to Thanksgiving I am going to be doing posts on all of the things I have to be thankful for...It is a great reminder of the many, many ways God is at work around us. I'd love for you to join me- looking for God in news ways- in the ordinary and in the unordinary. Seeing God for who He is and thanking Him for the work He has done in our lives and the work He continues to do.
Today, I am thankful for the Lord who is more than enough. You?