Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Names changes

3 year old Kai: "What is my name now?"
Me- "your name is Kai now"
Kai- "and who is she now?" (pointing to biological sister)
Me- "she is Jayla now"
Kai- "And who are you?"
Me- "I'm mommy now"
Kai- "This is so confusing!"
Me- "yes it is Kai, yes it is". LOL

All in all I have to say that changing names has gone fairly well. We started off calling them by their new name along with their old name, and have just recently started to not use the middle name as often. If they do call each other their birth name we do not say anything about it. I know in time it will become natural for them anyway. My friend Amy J asked me how that worked with the school since their adoption will not be finalized for 6 months still. Upon placement into our home CPS gives us a letter to give to the schools that allow them to go by their new names. So basically they are now allowed to use our last name and go by their new names. :0) I am so thankful for that otherwise it would be even more confusing.

3 comments:

Violet said...

Hi,
My name is Violet and I've been following your blog since "The voice of adventure" announced your online baby shower and your adopting the fabulous five! I love you and your husband faith to do this.

Do you mind me asking why you chose to change their names? I know a foster family who upon adopting any one of their foster kids will change their name if they are really young, or if the child wants to. She has biological sisters, one chose to keep her birth name and the other had hers changed....

Someday I want to adopt, and do foster care. I'm just wondering how/why you came to the decision to change?

THanks,
Violet

One Big Fat Sugar Mama said...

Thanks, Amy for answering my question. If I can be annoying, I have one more. As you know, we are adopting through the state as well. We were told that they discourage name changes. They didn't come right out and tell us that we couldn't , but they made us feel like we would get into trouble or that they would stop the process or something... Just wondering if you were told the same thing.

jill said...

We changed our sib groups names --
we asked them if they wanted to
and they did -- they were starting a new life (from a horrible
environment) and they wanted new
names -- their therapist said it
was a good thing to do because it
enabled them to turn the page on
the way they used to behave and
redefine themselves.

every day we put a little name sticker tag with their
new name on their shirt -- mostly
so I could remember to call them by their new names -- they would get really put out if I used their
old names. It helped alot and we
all had it figured out in a week.